TW Primer: 10 Tips to Shape an Authentic, Excellent Life
How to Tune Out the Noise, Trust Your Inner Voice, and Shape a Life of Impact
In his foreword for Lead Yourself First: Inspiring Leadership Through Solitude, best-selling author and business advisor Jim Collins writes,
“If leadership begins not with what you do but who you are, then when and how do you escape the noise [of our times] to find your purpose and summon the strength to pursue it?”
In our tech-fueled culture, this question is perhaps more poignant than ever. Each day digital distractions, 60-plus-hour work weeks (many of those in front of screens), and a barrage of daily news subtly warp our own point of view. And, frankly, our identity.
Quite a few people have told me some variation of, “I lose myself online.”
It’s challenging to hear ourselves think, let alone carve out our own distinct identity. Self-knowledge can give us the courage to forge ahead with our most impactful work, the confidence to persist, the discipline to master our sense of self and the skills to shape our days with intention.
It’s been my experience that to excel at our work and to foster an excellent life, we must develop and learn to listen to – to trust – our own voice of authority.
Authenticity and Authority
The word “authenticity” gets thrown around a lot. I don’t use it lightly. The word stems from the Greek “authentes,” which loosely translates to “one acting on one’s own authority.” In other words, authenticity is when your thoughts, beliefs, and actions are in accordance.
But here’s a paradox - just to make matters complex: There might not be a “fxied” self for you to “find” or “discover.” If you’re always “searching for your authentic self,” you might actually stunt your personal and professional growth.
Hmm. Think of it this way:
Do you assume you were born with one “true self” that you are supposed to “find”? Do you assume you were born with one “passion” in life you are supposed to discover and pursue? If so, you might assume that your identity and abilities are pre-determined.
Recent research shows that when people believe that their identity and abilities are predetermined, they are more likely to experience anxiety, disappointment, and inevitable burnout.
When you pursue a singular “authentic self,” you might unconsciously assume there is - or was - a singular path toward a singular self.
It’s possible that you in part construct your identity over time based on your actions, decisions, personal experiences, beliefs, and the values you act on.
You can act on your own authority to determine the kind of person you want to be and respond to the world in ways that align with that ever-evolving sense of self.
So, through this Tracking Wonder lens, to be authentic is to be honest with yourself and others as well as to acknowledge the dimensions of your self (past, present, and future) that make up your identity. You then can act with integrity to reflect your core values and virtues in action.
The inner authority you strive to define through your impactful work isn’t a static persona, but rather a dynamic state of becoming.
So, what are the major factors holding us back? And how do you shape your own brave container to build an excellent life?
Step Into Your Flow. Own Your Authority.
Learning to tune out all the white noise and really listen to your inner voice is no easy task, especially in our Age of Distraction. It requires deep questioning of our own assumptions about ourselves, the world, and what others say is true. Often it demands that we step out of our comfort zones and find purposeful solitude in a space distinct from our everyday habitat so we can hear ourselves think for longer than 48-second sound bytes.
Here are 10 Tracking Wonder Practices to help you tune in to your internal authority and advance your deep work.
Unplug mindfully. Disconnect from your digital distractions and carve out time to do your deep, impactful work. Better yet, remove temptation entirely and resort to more “primitive” technology (I recommend pen and paper). Even if you start with just 40 minutes of tech-free work at a time, you’ll soon notice that you can sharpen your focus, and start finishing the endeavors you previously slogged through between Facebook surfing before. It’s not easy - but that’s why change-makers from diverse backgrounds convene at our UNPLUGGED+UNBOUND immersive retreats.
Find your flow. Flow is when we sustain focus on creative challenges of our choosing to advance a purposeful endeavor. Flow is foundational to the work that matters most. Like any muscle, the more you exercise “flow,” the stronger it becomes. It goes from being work to being challenging play. Find those activities that call upon your highest creative and cognitive faculties, and shape time to do the work you love. If you want to co-flow, consider joining our next Deepen Your Focus & Flow at Work Cohort.
Work with your fear. We think of fear as something that needs to be overcome, conquered. But too often, we wait until some distant day when we aren’t afraid anymore to push forward with our most impactful work. Unfortunately, that day never or rarely comes. Rather than try to defeat fear (or wait for some unseen force to do so for you), work with your fear. Get curious about what’s driving your fear, and direct it toward the endeavors that matter most.
Override anxiety with curiosity. When we allow fear or anxiety to control our thoughts, we poke holes in our dreams, plan for worst-case scenarios, and assume failure rather than imagine fulfillment whatever the outcome. It’s important to remember that we can’t control outcomes, only our actions. You have to be prepared to show up every day with an open mind and a discerning eye, continually asking yourself what is working and what isn’t. Wonder is the wire-tripper that directs anxiety toward creative ends. And curiosity is the Rebel Facet of wonder that questions the status quo - including our personal status quo patterns of worrying more than wondering.
Seek excellence. Fear of failure can often hold us back so rather than think of your work in terms of success or defeat, make excellence in how you do what you do the priority. Be an audacious experimenter, continue to learn from mistakes or setbacks, fine-tune your methods, and creep ever closer to whatever you define to be ‘fulfilling.’
Shift focus from productivity to personal growth. We’re so busy trying to change the world, to make our mark, that we overlook the important, introspective work to be done. Our achievement culture’s obsession with progress and productivity means that we come to focus on economic work, rather than personal development and value external success over internal growth. Define S.L.O.W. (Simple Life Outside of Work) Goals so your mind knows what you consciously prioritize. Make time to develop a creative skill, adapt a better personal habit, and nurture your friendships and relationships. S.L.O.W. is just as valuable (if not more so) than screen time logged.
Get over yourself. We are ego-centric creatures. We can’t help it. Our reptile brain is wired for survival which means that we are prone to categorizing people and things, then assessing how those people or things compare to or affect us. Practice dissolving these biases by taking note of them when they arise.
Give yourself some credit. Very few of us give ourselves enough credit for all that we’ve accomplished. Once a goal is met, it’s taken as a given and we raise the bar higher. Pause to celebrate your small victories, taking into account all the effort you put into your relationships and personal growth (because this is work too). Reflect on how far you’ve come even if you still have a long way to go. For instance, I take groups and teams through Quarterly Vision Recalibration Sessions. An essential step here is to note in detail all that you accomplished the previous quarter and then write a story celebrating your efforts.
Reclaim your young genius. Based on my applied studies of Greek philosophy, positive psychology, existential psychology, and innovation, I define “genius” as your distinct force of character you were born with. The challenge? Most of us forget our genius. Many of us lose touch with our genius as we get older, and often it is replaced with insecurities or self-doubt. Your genius will guide you toward the work you’re continuously called toward - if you remember, recognize, and reclaim it. To tap into your young genius and infuse your work with wonder, recall times in your youth when you felt most free and alive without regard for reward. See your young self making, exploring, creating, leading, debating. Write down three adjectives that describe this younger self at its best and most free. Then aim to bring one or more of those attributes to your work every day. I unpack more in my latest book. And there’s a cohort course being seeded in the TW Labs!
Form a creative pack of peers. So much of our cognitive work is done solo, but when we don’t have other people to bounce ideas off of, self-doubt creeps in. Our inner critic gets harsher and obstacles seem too great to overcome. While only you can set your own goals and embark on the path toward them, you likely could benefit from your own creative pack of confidantes, colleagues, and even loved ones who are eager to help you. If you have a vision that you truly believe in, stay true to your genius and persist, but accept the insights of others to enrich this vision and your journey toward fulfilling it. A common Tracking Wonder motto is DIT Beats DIY (Do It Together Beats Do It Yourself).
Howard Gardner, Co-Director of Project Zero, explained that the role of the leader is “to create and refine a story so that it engages the attention and commitment of followers, thereby changing their views of who they are, what they are committed to, and what they want to achieve and why.”
By stepping into your flow, and owning your authority, you can begin to shape a life with meaningful work that ripples with impact.
So this week, try to slow down long enough to hear again the tempo of your own voice of authority so it can guide you to make the best decisions as you pursue your ideas and dream endeavors. Whether you’re a CEO or business leader whose days are packed with meetings or a knowledge worker whose hours often are counted by screen time, maybe you can ask yourself questions like, “What do I consider to be true? What do I believe in? Why? What does it mean to me to live a life of excellence and what’s one thing I’m doing today to live it that way?”
Your Turn to Wonder
»> What does it mean to you to live a life of excellence and possibility?
»> Which of these tips prompt your wondering?
Thanks for running with me,
Jeffrey